?

Log in

Most Epic Tom Waits Compilation

So I just burned a two disc compilation for my friend that's never heard Tom Waits.

I really I think I nailed it as a introductory playlist.

Whatta think?





Edit - In addition to this compilationI also gave my friend the whole Rain Dogs album.

I bet this works.

Great Success!!!

Well I've done it! I've pinpointed the very worst song ever created ever!

Enjoy!



I walk into the club looking kind of sexy now.
I see these shorties in the corner, they started making out.
They pull their panties down, they take their pants off.
Then they started getting freaky on the dance floor.
Shake it mommy give it to me like you need some love.
I got some bottles in the caddy that we can open up.
Let's get drunk tonight, baby we don't have to fuck.
And bring your friend along, maybe we can have some fun.

Let's get freaky now, let's get fucking freaky now. [x4]
I got these bitches all tipsy trying to sex me.
I know they want it, alcoholics are some sex freaks.
This ex and chronic gots me wanting to get messy.
So let's get messy girls, come on let's go get messy girls.
Come on bitch, you know you want this.
That hardcore shit will make you feel the toxic.
Fursachi, Rolex watches.
Bently coups with the 20's droppin. Convertible top, and the wheels spin.
I can taste that ice when my grill is in.
If you want me baby feel me in.
'cause I don't waste my time with lesbians.

Let's get freaky now, let's get fucking freaky now. [x4]
Liar! [x8]
Oh baby why did you have to lie to me. I can't play no more games.
These thoughts are slowly controlling me.
You're turning off the flame.
So go baby go baby.
You don't want me.
So go baby go baby.
Come and get me.
So go baby go baby.
You don't want me.
So go baby go!
Come and get me.
Let's get freaky now, let's get fucking freaky now. [x4

Why Do You Think They Call It Dope?

When talking about people that take medications all the time there's usually not a wrinkly old man in the corner pointing at me saying "that one".

I avoid it when I can.

However right now is an exception to the rule.

I'm about ready to say bottoms up to the stiffest chemical cocktail I have ever consumed.

We're talking a solid base of Vicodin, mixed with Antivert, topped with a heavy handful of Phenergan and a pinch of Motrin.

Supposedly this is going to grant me access to the retardation super highway in a jiffy.

Whooooo fuckin' hoooo!

See ya'll on the flipside.

Explodey

kristinak and I have both experienced this week what has been called our first mirgraine headaches. I believe she's gotten better, however I am posting this from the emergency room. I tried to go back to the doctor on Friday to tell him that my symptoms haven't gone away but he didn't call me back nor did his off hours service answer the phone. I'm pretty irked about that and the fact that my insurance company doesn't take calls on the weekend. WTF! So I have been trying to make it through the weekend because migraines don't last more than a few days, right? Well that's what I thought until about 10pm tonight when my head was still feeling like it was going to go explodey. I got pretty freaked out and worked myself into a state of mind that really didn't give a fuck how much the ER bill was going to be. Note to future self DO NOT watch House while dealing with an undiagnosed medical problem. Its just not a good idea.

The doctor here is talking sinus headaches a whatnot, which actually feels more legit than a mirgaine. I don't really have a headache, I just feel very constricted and my vision is very messed up. I'm waiting on Doc to get me some drugs and then I'll be on my way. Hopefully this works because the prospect of pulling my right eyeball out is sounding pretty good if this doesn't work.

Posted via LiveJournal.app.

Tags:

Sorry for the delay. The reaction was pretty underwhelming.



I seriously thought he was going to get really pissed.

Since this video didn't really deliver I figured it would be a good idea to post another video of Jeff. One that might be considered pretty embarrassing.

Here's Jeff suuuuuuuper drunk:



PS: Youtube's video quality is quite annoying.

JEFF WE CAN!

For the last six months or so my coworker Jeff has become increasingly more and more annoying. Granted we have this kind of 'messing around' banter going on between us, but he just doesn't know when to stop. Knowing that I'm a particular person when it comes to symmetry and placement he finds great joy in fucking with stuff on my desk. Which to me, is fine. Game fucking on. I'm one of the most strategically vindictive people you will ever meet, but the one time I retaliated by taking all the cigarettes out of his pack and putting them back upsidedown he got super pissed off and told me I went to far.

Pretty much ever since then I've just put up with him and haven't done anything back. But for some reason, lately, the frequency in which he fucks with my stuff seems to be increasing. Over the course of the last month I've told him several times that he is seriously bothering me and that I would like him to stop...which in turn has made him happy and has caused him to fuck with me more.

Yesterday was the last straw when he rearranged my filing inboxes.

For the purposes of the blog post I'll need to offer up some background information about Jeff. Jeff is the most conservative republican I have ever met in my entire life. Borderline racist and closeted about it, homophobic, doesn't like Bill O'Reilly because he's too soft on liberals - for example his preelection interview with Obama.

Oh and there's a good topic. Jeff HATES Obama with a burning fury. When I txted "Live long and prosper" to Jeff on NYE he responded with "It's going to be hard with a negro muslim running the country".

Now I know what you're thinking. How could I even talk with this guy!? He's super disgusting. To tell you the truth, I actually like Jeff quite a bit even though I think every social stance that he takes is 110% bullshit. I guess I've decided no matter how horrid I think a person is, it's still not grounds to hate them. And actually I've learned quite a bit about myself through my relationship with Jeff. I've definitely gotten a lot of practice in effectively standing up for what I believe in when surrounded by people of opposite viewpoints. But enough with the hippy jibba-jabba...

...after I realized the last straw had been pulled yesterday I slowly started thinking about my revenge. It finally came to me last night while talking with JB.

I'm going to wallpaper Jeff's cube with Obama materials!!!

So that's what I did after Jeff went home today.

BEFORE:


AFTER:


Oh and, let's not forget the nice Yes We Can poster on his cabinet!


And definitely don't forget the Yes We Can poster written in Hebrew on the inside door of his cabinet where he's not likely to find it right away!


Each of the 50-some panels are individually taped to his desk.

I'm 95% sure that he's going to be super fucking pissed off when he gets to work tomorrow. That's cool, because I'm going to secretly record his reaction on my camcorder and then upload it to youtube.

Damn, tomorrow is going to be great!

TGIF


Edit: I had to make a small improvement this morning because the title for this post was just too good to not include in the project.



T-Minus 59 minutes and counting!

If marriage isn't a right...

...then what is it?


Edit: Sorry, I should have been clearer with my question. The too-smart-for-his-own-good homophobe that I work with keeps winning our debates because I'm not as prepared as I need to be. I tell him that the reason why the will of the people was overturned by judges in San Francisco is because you can't vote on people's rights. He replies by telling me that marriage isn't a right. I'm trying to either validate or invalidate that statement. So, legally, what is marriage?